Being Late and Being Torn

I’ve found a way to make it work but the lure of chocolates, ice cream, anime fantasies and rock music have swayed me towards an ideal that others would have otherwise dismissed as illogical.

Where do I start?

The grass, while green,

Has always been better on the other side.

The mind, swaying

And the body wants to settle.

The heart, made of gold

Doesn’t fit with the hardened soul

Conviction, without action

Is like loving for the wrong reasons.

Although dilemmas are definitely unavoidable in the midst of chaos, uncertainty and confusion, intention makes all the difference as to how uncertainties are dealt with. Being stuck in traffic and being late for your appointment because all along you thought it was a Tuesday non-rush hour and so you left home thirty minutes later than you would have, is a far better excuse than saying you were sick, you had an accident, or some other more “acceptable” excuse. For one, it’s too obvious when you go on lying. Two, it makes you look stupid. And all these for your ego at the cost of relationships, friendships and states of mind disfigured and sometimes never patched up again.

Lies, layered with white, do not produce better lies—or until you think it does. But when you say it does, you are lying to yourself, aren’t you?

Kintsugi (金継ぎ) or Kintsukuroi (金繕い), the Japanese art of fixing broken pottery. Image credit: Wikipedia.

Although torn and broken, the art makes it known that breakage is a part of history and so should be accepted and taken in context as a catalyst for growth in the midst of change. The scars could be taken as remnants of weakness, or of strength. Our ideas of “strength” and “weakness” are therefore relative and so it’s how we see life and make it known to us. It might sound corny but it’s amazing how interconnected this world is that even a small piece of pot can make a difference as to how we see life.

It’s all a matter of perspective. Although there are so many things out of our control, if we choose to see life as to how we want it to be, it is how it will be.

I could tell that my writing has definitely gone rusty after a long, long time of not putting in much effort and time into practicing. The words are coming slow, the “heavy notch” remains as I write, and the ideas do not flow as easily as they would have. I know it will take time to have that bit of an edge again and even though I’m not a good writer, at least I know I’m giving words and ideas a bit of justice 🙂

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